Terry Lynn O'Brien Walk #138 at Swartz Creek UMC
Testimonial from Terry Lynn O'Brien (July, 2010)
My name is Terry Lynn O’Brien.
I took my Emmaus Walk #138 in May of 2007
in Swartz Creek and sat at the table of “PEACE”.
My story is a “before” and “after” story. Before my
walk to Emmaus I was an angry woman - especially
with God. You see, I blamed God for all of my
problems and unhappiness. As my story unfolds,
you will see clearly just how miraculous our God in
Heaven can be.
I am the daughter of Charles and Evelene O’Brien,
born on February 17, 1956 with a cleft palate and
other physical problems. I was born at a hospital
in Flint, where my mother experienced a very
difficult birth with serious complications such as
hemorrhages. I was rushed to Ann Arbor for some
immediate surgery, to close the palate and my lip.
At the time there was nothing in Flint , so the
surgeries where preformed in Ann Arbor.
I spent much of my childhood in and out of the
hospital with surgery after surgery. That was just a
beginning. I lived my young years knowing I was
different from my siblings and from other kids and
always longed to “fit in”.
Other kids can be cruel, so I withdrew into my own
world of books and television shows to help me feel
better. My parents did the best they could raising
me. They gave me an education and speech classes
and always tried to protect me from the hurt that
the world brought.
As I grew older that “protection” became almost
suffocation for me as I tried to live a life offered to
all young adults. I wanted to experience life like
everyone else. As I became a young adult, my
anger continued to develop within me. I was not
only angry with God for creating me differently,
but I was also angry with my family for treating
me differently. I was angry with friends, I felt had
let me down by moving on while I seemed “stuck
where I was.”
The angrier I became, the more I withdrew into my
own little world of make-believe characters. I think
I was even angry with myself - but didn’t know why?
I was wondering, Why couldn’t I just accept myself
and grow from there? I had done nothing to cause
my disabilities yet I didn’t like or accept myself.
Anger has no boundaries. An angry person has a
deep hurt and I didn’t know how to get past that
hurt and unhappiness.
I began to go to church with my mother and the
people seemed different. The church people seem
to truly accept me and love me even though I could
not bring myself to do the same. The church even
gave me a job as a bulletin secretary and little did
they know, that one of the desires of my heart was
to be a professional secretary in an office. Not
exactly what I had in mind, but it was a beginning.
Yet I still lay in bed at night blaming God for all my
problems and unhappiness. Before I tell you my
experience I had with the Emmaus Walk, let me
tell you about two different books I read with my
book club friends.
The first book I read was "Five People You Meet
in Heaven." It is about a man who got into a
terrible accident and died, and went to heaven.
There he met 5 different people, Each one would
take him back to a time in his past. He learned
what he did wrong and understood what he
needed to do it over again, and learn from his
past mistakes.
While I was reading this book, I fell asleep and
dreamt that I died and went to Heaven. I met
my guardian Angel, he gave me a mirror, and
told me to take a look at myself. I was in shock
when I saw, my face. My speech and hearing
were restored. And as a bonus I was TALL!
I asked my guardian angel, why I had to wait
to get to Heaven for restoration, but before
my guardian angel answered me, I woke up.
Again the anger burned within me. I was on
a downhill spiral and didn’t know how to stop
it. Anger was eating me up inside like a lion
devouring me from the inside out.
The next book I read was Memory Keeper’s
Daughter. It is about a doctor, named
David who delivered his wife’s twin babies.
The first twin was a healthy baby boy,
named Paul. The second twin, with Down
Syndrome, was an unhealthy baby girl
named Phoebe. David told his wife Norah
a lie that their daughter died in childbirth.
David had given the baby girl to his nurse,
Caroline, to take her away. Caroline was
surprised that he did not want anything to
do with Phoebe. David wanted the nurse to
take Phoebe to an institutional place, but at
that place, it was not safe for a baby.
So without the doctor‘s knowledge, Caroline
took Phoebe home with her.
As I was reading the story, I thought to myself
how cruel the father is being, not wanting his
own daughter to raise, and then lying to his
wife about it. My guess was that he didn’t
want to spend money on special education
and all of the medical procedures needed to
help his daughter, and that he didn’t even
want to love his daughter at all.
Caroline did a wonderful job raising Phoebe,
and lovingly fought hard to get the best education
she possible could for her new daughter.
As years went by, David didn’t have the courage to
tell his wife the truth about what he did. In the
meantime, he received letters and pictures of
Phoebe from Caroline. David was beginning
to feel guilty for what he had done.
Paul, his son became a musician despite his
father disapproval, and now David's marriage
was in trouble. David died, before he had a
chance to tell his wife the truth. I thought
that was a chicken’s way out. When Caroline
heard about David’s death, she wrote a letter
to his wife telling her the truth. Phoebe, born
with Down’s Syndrome was alive and living
with her in Pittsburgh. Paul and his mother
went to Pittsburgh to meet Caroline and
Phoebe. Caroline tried to explain to Phoebe
that Norah was her birth mother, and Paul
was her twin brother. Phoebe was so confused
and had a hard time understanding. Phoebe
continued living with Caroline, the only mother
she ever really knew.
After reading this book, I couldn’t help wonder
what would have happened if my father had
done the same thing with me, because I was
not a healthy baby. But it didn’t happened
that way. I am still here and proud to be
an O’Brien,
After reading these books, I learned about
accepting myself, and liking myself the
way I am. I learned to love myself first,
then love others as they love me. I learned
that what God wants me to be, and that he
had a purpose for me of such as being
here today. I have learned about my past
mistakes in life. These books did give
me insight and understanding of myself.
Now, let me tell you about my experience
on my Emmaus Walk.
One day my sponsor, Kathy P. talked to me about her
“Walk to Emmaus.” I had never heard of this spiritual
retreat and as she explained her experience more and
more, excitement began to build. But why? I didn’t
like being around people I didn’t know. Would these
strangers accept me or would they be cruel like so
many others had been along the way? My sponsor
talked about 3+ days with so much love and
acceptance that my socks would be blown off!
I sent in my application and tried not to anticipate
another let down. The week before my walk, I got
very scared, but my sponsor talked more about the
love of Jesus and she told me to “empty myself out,
so God could fill me up with just what I needed”
MY MIRACLE: During the 3 + days at Emmaus,
I opened up myself just a crack and God broke
through all those years of anger, resentment and
unhappiness. HE melted away my self-hate.
HE restored my self confidence and filled me with
HIS love until it flowed out of me like an overflowing
bathtub!
God does not make mistakes. God has no accidents.
TERRY LYNN O’BRIEN has had a hard life, but God
has never left my side. I’ve never had a tear that HE
didn’t share with me. Jesus gave me a life full of
love - love to HIM - love to me - love for others and
a whole bunch of friends who love and accept me.
I will forever praise HIS HOLY NAME! And now
I have another home, being a part of Emmaus
community serving God and others, this is where I belong.
Here comes the “after” part of my story on my 4th day,
I went to the dentist who in turn referred me to
Dr. Ian Jackson, a cleft palate specialist in Detroit.
I had surgery performed by Dr. Jackson last July 2007.
Then again in April, 2008. In 2007, he fixed the hole in
the roof of my mouth and performed other surgery
on my face. Dr. Jackson did this to help my breathing
and speech, but also to change the shape of my face.
Was I looking for this procedure? All I did was go to
the dentist. God worked out the rest. Will this be the
answer to the years of unhappiness for me? Only time
will tell what the surgery accomplishes. I know this for
sure that Jesus loves me just like I am and He will never
leave me or forsake me.
TERRY LYNN O’BRIEN is full of the joy of the Lord.
Everything else is just frosting on the cake!
If you were to watch a video of me growing up, You would
know about all of the surgeries in my childhood, in the 70’s,
my teenager years, and in the late 80’s as an adult.
Surgery and more surgery. Finally in the last 2 years, more
surgery by Dr. Jackson, who has done a wonderful job.
He did miracle work on me, along with God’s help.
I am very grateful for all the things he did for me, very
thankful that he took me as his patient.
God was there for me, holding my hand while I was in surgery.
Later in 2008 and 2009, Dr. Perez, a teeth implant surgeon
completed two surgeries, and a bone graft on one side, one
bone graft didn’t go very well. I will be having a new denture
later this year, after I see Dr. Perez again in October to see
how the healing goes. Then it can be over and I can move on
with my life and do all the things I want to do.
Here are 3 principals/ 3 things to remember:
FIRST: love yourself the way you are, then love others
ACCEPT: the way we are now
RESPECT: yourself and others
LEARN: to understand and learn to love in return, like Jesus does.
Someone sent me a poem that had a good message,
You have the ability to use your talents. No matter how you
use them, God created them for you to use and be the person
you are today.
Before I close, let me say that for the past 20 years as the
church bulletin secretary, I was asked to step down, because
of the church finances. But, God had a plan for me -to try
new challenges and move on.
Starting with being part of a team for an Emmaus Walk.
I have served on two Walks, and realize how much I really
appreciate being a part of it. Last Springs Walk, I saw
several women, who were on my Walk 138. It was like
a short reunion for us. It sure did bring back good
memories of when we were at our Walk. I will always
cherish the memories that I made with them.
Now I know what the woman who worked as team for
Walk 138 had to do and all the things they learned to make
it special for all. Just seeing them again, made me think how
much I really appreciated being on the Walk. I now understand
what my sponsor was trying to tell me, like suggesting I go to
the 4th day Gathering for walks 137 & 138. I didn’t know what
it would be about at the time. On Saturday night, during the
candlelight service of my walk, I almost cried. I remembered
standing on the platform singing “Glory to God” and seeing
Kathy, my sponsor waving at me, letting me know that she
was there. I will always cherish that special time.
Now it is my turn to serve God and serve on another team.
I now appreciate my own experience even more. I am glad
that I had a sponsor who cared about me and took me to my
Walk. If I hadn’t gone, I would not have met so many people
who I now call friends and Sisters of Christ. I’d like to thank
Kathy, my sponsor, one more time, for bringing me home.
Thank you, because I will always remember Walk 138. She
made it special for me, and I will never forget that. So I
have been praying to God to leave the door open to serve
where called.
Thank you for supporting and being there for me. To all
of you my friends, both outside and in my church, I am
very grateful to have you as friends and thank you for
being a part of my life. I like to say thanks to my mother,
who is no longer with us, but she did bring me to
South Mundy UMC, and I am blessed to call this
church my second home.
Thank you all for believing in me and having faith in me
and specially thanks to my New Found Friend, Roxann K.
She is amazing as she taught me a lot about Emmaus.
If it wasn’t for her, I would not be here today. Thank
you for believing in me and being a part of my life.
I don’t know any other words I can use to describe her.
She is so great and wonderful to me, I am so thankful to
Roxann for picking me to be your new found friend.
I love all of you for sharing your time with me.
Always remember this;
GOD LOVES YOU AND SO DO I.
THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU.
My name is Terry Lynn O’Brien.
I took my Emmaus Walk #138 in May of 2007
in Swartz Creek and sat at the table of “PEACE”.
My story is a “before” and “after” story. Before my
walk to Emmaus I was an angry woman - especially
with God. You see, I blamed God for all of my
problems and unhappiness. As my story unfolds,
you will see clearly just how miraculous our God in
Heaven can be.
I am the daughter of Charles and Evelene O’Brien,
born on February 17, 1956 with a cleft palate and
other physical problems. I was born at a hospital
in Flint, where my mother experienced a very
difficult birth with serious complications such as
hemorrhages. I was rushed to Ann Arbor for some
immediate surgery, to close the palate and my lip.
At the time there was nothing in Flint , so the
surgeries where preformed in Ann Arbor.
I spent much of my childhood in and out of the
hospital with surgery after surgery. That was just a
beginning. I lived my young years knowing I was
different from my siblings and from other kids and
always longed to “fit in”.
Other kids can be cruel, so I withdrew into my own
world of books and television shows to help me feel
better. My parents did the best they could raising
me. They gave me an education and speech classes
and always tried to protect me from the hurt that
the world brought.
As I grew older that “protection” became almost
suffocation for me as I tried to live a life offered to
all young adults. I wanted to experience life like
everyone else. As I became a young adult, my
anger continued to develop within me. I was not
only angry with God for creating me differently,
but I was also angry with my family for treating
me differently. I was angry with friends, I felt had
let me down by moving on while I seemed “stuck
where I was.”
The angrier I became, the more I withdrew into my
own little world of make-believe characters. I think
I was even angry with myself - but didn’t know why?
I was wondering, Why couldn’t I just accept myself
and grow from there? I had done nothing to cause
my disabilities yet I didn’t like or accept myself.
Anger has no boundaries. An angry person has a
deep hurt and I didn’t know how to get past that
hurt and unhappiness.
I began to go to church with my mother and the
people seemed different. The church people seem
to truly accept me and love me even though I could
not bring myself to do the same. The church even
gave me a job as a bulletin secretary and little did
they know, that one of the desires of my heart was
to be a professional secretary in an office. Not
exactly what I had in mind, but it was a beginning.
Yet I still lay in bed at night blaming God for all my
problems and unhappiness. Before I tell you my
experience I had with the Emmaus Walk, let me
tell you about two different books I read with my
book club friends.
The first book I read was "Five People You Meet
in Heaven." It is about a man who got into a
terrible accident and died, and went to heaven.
There he met 5 different people, Each one would
take him back to a time in his past. He learned
what he did wrong and understood what he
needed to do it over again, and learn from his
past mistakes.
While I was reading this book, I fell asleep and
dreamt that I died and went to Heaven. I met
my guardian Angel, he gave me a mirror, and
told me to take a look at myself. I was in shock
when I saw, my face. My speech and hearing
were restored. And as a bonus I was TALL!
I asked my guardian angel, why I had to wait
to get to Heaven for restoration, but before
my guardian angel answered me, I woke up.
Again the anger burned within me. I was on
a downhill spiral and didn’t know how to stop
it. Anger was eating me up inside like a lion
devouring me from the inside out.
The next book I read was Memory Keeper’s
Daughter. It is about a doctor, named
David who delivered his wife’s twin babies.
The first twin was a healthy baby boy,
named Paul. The second twin, with Down
Syndrome, was an unhealthy baby girl
named Phoebe. David told his wife Norah
a lie that their daughter died in childbirth.
David had given the baby girl to his nurse,
Caroline, to take her away. Caroline was
surprised that he did not want anything to
do with Phoebe. David wanted the nurse to
take Phoebe to an institutional place, but at
that place, it was not safe for a baby.
So without the doctor‘s knowledge, Caroline
took Phoebe home with her.
As I was reading the story, I thought to myself
how cruel the father is being, not wanting his
own daughter to raise, and then lying to his
wife about it. My guess was that he didn’t
want to spend money on special education
and all of the medical procedures needed to
help his daughter, and that he didn’t even
want to love his daughter at all.
Caroline did a wonderful job raising Phoebe,
and lovingly fought hard to get the best education
she possible could for her new daughter.
As years went by, David didn’t have the courage to
tell his wife the truth about what he did. In the
meantime, he received letters and pictures of
Phoebe from Caroline. David was beginning
to feel guilty for what he had done.
Paul, his son became a musician despite his
father disapproval, and now David's marriage
was in trouble. David died, before he had a
chance to tell his wife the truth. I thought
that was a chicken’s way out. When Caroline
heard about David’s death, she wrote a letter
to his wife telling her the truth. Phoebe, born
with Down’s Syndrome was alive and living
with her in Pittsburgh. Paul and his mother
went to Pittsburgh to meet Caroline and
Phoebe. Caroline tried to explain to Phoebe
that Norah was her birth mother, and Paul
was her twin brother. Phoebe was so confused
and had a hard time understanding. Phoebe
continued living with Caroline, the only mother
she ever really knew.
After reading this book, I couldn’t help wonder
what would have happened if my father had
done the same thing with me, because I was
not a healthy baby. But it didn’t happened
that way. I am still here and proud to be
an O’Brien,
After reading these books, I learned about
accepting myself, and liking myself the
way I am. I learned to love myself first,
then love others as they love me. I learned
that what God wants me to be, and that he
had a purpose for me of such as being
here today. I have learned about my past
mistakes in life. These books did give
me insight and understanding of myself.
Now, let me tell you about my experience
on my Emmaus Walk.
One day my sponsor, Kathy P. talked to me about her
“Walk to Emmaus.” I had never heard of this spiritual
retreat and as she explained her experience more and
more, excitement began to build. But why? I didn’t
like being around people I didn’t know. Would these
strangers accept me or would they be cruel like so
many others had been along the way? My sponsor
talked about 3+ days with so much love and
acceptance that my socks would be blown off!
I sent in my application and tried not to anticipate
another let down. The week before my walk, I got
very scared, but my sponsor talked more about the
love of Jesus and she told me to “empty myself out,
so God could fill me up with just what I needed”
MY MIRACLE: During the 3 + days at Emmaus,
I opened up myself just a crack and God broke
through all those years of anger, resentment and
unhappiness. HE melted away my self-hate.
HE restored my self confidence and filled me with
HIS love until it flowed out of me like an overflowing
bathtub!
God does not make mistakes. God has no accidents.
TERRY LYNN O’BRIEN has had a hard life, but God
has never left my side. I’ve never had a tear that HE
didn’t share with me. Jesus gave me a life full of
love - love to HIM - love to me - love for others and
a whole bunch of friends who love and accept me.
I will forever praise HIS HOLY NAME! And now
I have another home, being a part of Emmaus
community serving God and others, this is where I belong.
Here comes the “after” part of my story on my 4th day,
I went to the dentist who in turn referred me to
Dr. Ian Jackson, a cleft palate specialist in Detroit.
I had surgery performed by Dr. Jackson last July 2007.
Then again in April, 2008. In 2007, he fixed the hole in
the roof of my mouth and performed other surgery
on my face. Dr. Jackson did this to help my breathing
and speech, but also to change the shape of my face.
Was I looking for this procedure? All I did was go to
the dentist. God worked out the rest. Will this be the
answer to the years of unhappiness for me? Only time
will tell what the surgery accomplishes. I know this for
sure that Jesus loves me just like I am and He will never
leave me or forsake me.
TERRY LYNN O’BRIEN is full of the joy of the Lord.
Everything else is just frosting on the cake!
If you were to watch a video of me growing up, You would
know about all of the surgeries in my childhood, in the 70’s,
my teenager years, and in the late 80’s as an adult.
Surgery and more surgery. Finally in the last 2 years, more
surgery by Dr. Jackson, who has done a wonderful job.
He did miracle work on me, along with God’s help.
I am very grateful for all the things he did for me, very
thankful that he took me as his patient.
God was there for me, holding my hand while I was in surgery.
Later in 2008 and 2009, Dr. Perez, a teeth implant surgeon
completed two surgeries, and a bone graft on one side, one
bone graft didn’t go very well. I will be having a new denture
later this year, after I see Dr. Perez again in October to see
how the healing goes. Then it can be over and I can move on
with my life and do all the things I want to do.
Here are 3 principals/ 3 things to remember:
FIRST: love yourself the way you are, then love others
ACCEPT: the way we are now
RESPECT: yourself and others
LEARN: to understand and learn to love in return, like Jesus does.
Someone sent me a poem that had a good message,
You have the ability to use your talents. No matter how you
use them, God created them for you to use and be the person
you are today.
Before I close, let me say that for the past 20 years as the
church bulletin secretary, I was asked to step down, because
of the church finances. But, God had a plan for me -to try
new challenges and move on.
Starting with being part of a team for an Emmaus Walk.
I have served on two Walks, and realize how much I really
appreciate being a part of it. Last Springs Walk, I saw
several women, who were on my Walk 138. It was like
a short reunion for us. It sure did bring back good
memories of when we were at our Walk. I will always
cherish the memories that I made with them.
Now I know what the woman who worked as team for
Walk 138 had to do and all the things they learned to make
it special for all. Just seeing them again, made me think how
much I really appreciated being on the Walk. I now understand
what my sponsor was trying to tell me, like suggesting I go to
the 4th day Gathering for walks 137 & 138. I didn’t know what
it would be about at the time. On Saturday night, during the
candlelight service of my walk, I almost cried. I remembered
standing on the platform singing “Glory to God” and seeing
Kathy, my sponsor waving at me, letting me know that she
was there. I will always cherish that special time.
Now it is my turn to serve God and serve on another team.
I now appreciate my own experience even more. I am glad
that I had a sponsor who cared about me and took me to my
Walk. If I hadn’t gone, I would not have met so many people
who I now call friends and Sisters of Christ. I’d like to thank
Kathy, my sponsor, one more time, for bringing me home.
Thank you, because I will always remember Walk 138. She
made it special for me, and I will never forget that. So I
have been praying to God to leave the door open to serve
where called.
Thank you for supporting and being there for me. To all
of you my friends, both outside and in my church, I am
very grateful to have you as friends and thank you for
being a part of my life. I like to say thanks to my mother,
who is no longer with us, but she did bring me to
South Mundy UMC, and I am blessed to call this
church my second home.
Thank you all for believing in me and having faith in me
and specially thanks to my New Found Friend, Roxann K.
She is amazing as she taught me a lot about Emmaus.
If it wasn’t for her, I would not be here today. Thank
you for believing in me and being a part of my life.
I don’t know any other words I can use to describe her.
She is so great and wonderful to me, I am so thankful to
Roxann for picking me to be your new found friend.
I love all of you for sharing your time with me.
Always remember this;
GOD LOVES YOU AND SO DO I.
THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU.